Dance like no one is watching but show up like someone is taking notes.

Who remembers this story; a boy walking home notices another kid carrying all their books and school gear, the kid stumbles and falls (or gets pushed) and the boy offers a hand. On the walk they talk and bond and the other boy shares that he had cleared out his locker because he had planned to kill himself over the weekend. This simple act of kindness saved his life. 

It’s a very Chicken Soup for the Soul story (often credited as the original source), but it’s also just a little bit true. Rarely this dramatic but showing up has impact. There doesn’t even have to be direct interaction. Sometimes we observe behavior that makes a profound impression without the players ever knowing they had a role in it. Years before I had baby cousins or nephews, I watched this woman interact with her child at a film screening. The child was becoming excitable but before things got disruptive, the woman turned her full attention to this half-sized being and spoke in a low, calm voice. I couldn’t hear specific words but imagined a stern behavior adjustment taking place. The next thing I knew two dreadlocked heads bowed to each other and went into meditation for a few minutes. I was mesmerized and amazed. The sudden aura of calm was breathtaking. That moment continues to impact my work and interaction with children to this day. I don’t even know their names and they don’t know this story.
The table is easily turned. You might unwittingly be a role model.  

There’s a gorgeous trend on the socials of women posting tributes to their friends for Women’s History Month. Yesterday I received a notification that I was mentioned in a comment – by someone I’d met once. Huh? Of course I took the bait and clicked. It was a humbling moment. Back when I was a teen model in the late 80s I never imagined that anyone but my family or friends cared about when I showed up in a local flyer or catalogue. But here was this woman recounting the positive impact of seeing herself reflected in me and then meeting me years later. She said some very nice things.

I give credit to my own mother for this moment. She taught me to “take care how you show up in life, you never know who is watching.” Even if it’s imperfect I do my best to show up and to shine.

There is no pressure to impress or dazzle. It’s about showing up with your full self and participating in the human race in a positive engaged way. Let someone else decide if what they see is solving a problem, setting an example, inspiring an idea. We are all influencers in our small ways. Just show up. And shine. Do it for your fans.