you never know

I’m sitting on my tailbone, legs splayed, face slack with boredom, but my cells are taught and prepared.  I’m holding my breath ever so slightly wondering what the first line will be.  Am I going to say it?  Is it going to come from her?  All I know is that I am in detention.

This is the opening moment of an improv bit.  As my partner and I play out the scene for the next five minutes, we are clueless about will happen from one moment to the next.  But we’re committed to being present and have each other’s back for the duration of the ride.  Along the way we’ll have some laughs.  We’ll probably hit a few bumps too.

Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd.               

                                                                                                              ~ Voltaire

Improv is a lot like life.  Life doesn’t come with a GPS, you navigate on the fly.  We might have an idea of the destination, but the journey is pure improvisation.  Nothing is certain.

And yet, we act with complete certitude… until we realize our ignorance.  And then we correct it.  Or not.  But that just delays and exacerbates the inevitable.  Ask for directions soon after making a wrong turn and you’re back on track sooner than if you keep making wrong turns trying to find your way back.  But some people like getting lost, they enjoy the challenge and/or adventure.  That’s cool, all boats float.  The key is knowing you’re lost.

The truth is we’re all a little lost, but I can only speak for myself.  It’s staggering  how much I don’t know.  There I said it.  I used to like to know everything.  I was the worst kind of  little miss know-it-all, I’d make up what I didn’t know.  Not out right lies, but I’d fill in the gaps with my own theories, presented as facts.  But there is freedom in not knowing.  The freedom of discovery.  No map can show every detail of the road.  We discover them on the journey.  And it really is all about the journey.