Irma was as bitter as she was ugly. Neither were her fault. Irma was the unfortunate second twin. There were a lot of twins in the family; a set in every branch of the tree. Being a twin in and of itself was nothing special, but if you were the Read more
Benny decided to leave the car. He’d have to come back early and get it, early as in before the street sweepers came. Not that they ever came right at 8am, but the ticket police sure as heck were timely with their citations. Benny decided to leave the car because Read more
There was no question this Gene was doing a good thing. Fuck the puppy mills. Why does my best friend have to be a pure breed? I had to convince Clea because she had her heart set on a pug. “How superficial do you want to prove you are? If Read more
Things were going so well. Lia wonders if she jinxed things. She can’t help reviewing the tally so far: he’s a vegan, he has a sister who is a professor of feminist Victorian literature, he likes backgammon, he hates poker, he rides a bike, doesn’t do yoga but is willing Read more
“I bite my nails, that’s my one vice” M says. I used to bite my nails. But in my teens I was shamed into stopping. I had just started modeling and I remember a hair stylist using words like ‘disgusting’ and ‘gross’ when he looked at Read more
Timing is everything. That is the number one rule in comedy. At least that was what Carrie was told when she started writing jokes at ten. Her dad said there were too many details to keep track of but she should stick with it because redheads make great comediennes. Carrie Read more
Ninety-nine problems and the bitch is one. Billy says it’s my fault for locking her out that time. She was only outside for half an hour! My question is why didn’t she bark when she heard me heading to the front door? Billie always barks, yeah, his dog’s Read more
One day they would find her body fossilized in the memory foam. Every morning Nikki felt she sank a little lower into the mattress and had to pry herself out like a Looney Tunes character in wet concrete. It took all her fight for the day to get up. She Read more